Sunday, April 22, 2012

Coming Home

" 'Yet even now,' declares the Lord, 'return to me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning; and rend your hearts and not your garments.' "  Joel 2:12-13 ESV

In life, there are many times we leave friends and family for long periods of time, only to return home with open arms and hugs to those who truly love and care for us.  As humans, we leave the love of our family and friends behind for any number of reasons, both good and bad: business trips, military deployments, college, job offers, and unfortunately sometimes affairs.  But one truth is certain, when we are loved, when we are truly loved, it is so sweet when we return home (literally or emotionally) and are accepted into open arms, no matter how good or bad the circumstances are.

I was reading this passage from Joel the other day and this sentiment rang so true with me:  God, my Savior and Creator, has been calling me back into relationship with Him.  This relationship is like no other I can have on earth.  There is an unconditional love in this relationship that I will never find with any human, no matter how much my wife, parents, kids or friends love me.  There is a bond I have had with God to which He also yearns and calls to me for.  God wants to be in my life and love me, no matter how far I run from Him in the good times and bad, or no matter how much I deny Him as his disciple Peter once did.  I must say that I miss Him too.  I miss the connection I once had with God. 

I must caution anyone reading this that I am not looking for the mountain top experience, the rush of love and acceptance once felt by two people who love each other.  What I am looking for is something far greater than that.  This is what my relationship with Christ looks like:

Its ugly, and not because of my God, but because of me.  Its ugly because I sit here and fight and bloody up this relationship through my constant yearnings that are not those of God.  Its a bond where I struggle to get over my own selfish desires and truly listen for the promptings and teachings of the one who saved me.  Its a knock down drag out fight some days because I feel as though I should zig, and God is gently pushing me to zag. Its a conversation where he firmly, yet lovingly tells me where I am falling short for him, yet I can question Him on why I think he is falling short for me.  Funny thing is, he never falls short for me- I fall short for me when I leave him..........and then I come back........to open arms.

God loves you and he loves me.  When will we come home?

Freak

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